I bet you’ve read lots of articles about perfectionism, the comparison trap and how the impact of holding yourself to unrealistic standards can lead to self-defeating beliefs, discouragement, anxiety and depression.
This blog isn’t about that.
Do you like your reflection? When you look in the mirror, what do you see? I see dark circles under my eyes, I see the scars of life, I see grey hairs. Some days that's all I see and those are the days it's hardest to function. I can't seem to get my hair just right and despite having a closet overflowing with clothes, I have nothing to wear. It's on those days when I stare at the wrong things in the mirror, that I lose all perspective.
I've never felt like I fit in.
I've lived on the east coast, west coast and in the south, which makes for a unique mix of dialect, fashion sense and values. Although I've lived in California for over 20 years, I still say "y'all" and rock cowboy boots any chance I get. I'm a black woman who has spent most of my life living in predominantly white neighborhoods and being the minority at school and work.
I have a confession. I am a recovering shopaholic. I didn't used to be able to leave my house without a designer handbag on my arm. I know it sounds ridiculous and I'm truly embarrassed to admit it now, but for years it was part of my identity and I literally felt naked without one.